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Don't Hate the Player Character...
}} Belkar enjoys life on his terms. Haley deals with the aftermath of her dispute with the Guild. Cast * Haley Starshine ◀ ▶ * Belkar Bitterleaf ◀ ▶ * Mr. Scruffy ◀ ▶ * Celia ◀ ▶ * Jenny ◀ ▶ * A Barber Transcript Belkar whistles while carrying a plate of food. Belkar: ♪ Belkar: Hey, Mr. Scruffy, I'm back. Back up. Mr. Scruffy: Meow! Meow! Meow! Belkar: No, no, back up. Mr. Scruffy: Meow! Belkar enters a darkened room. Belkar: Check it out: Pastrami, and turkey, both with extra pickles. Belkar: Plus, a little treat for you: A mackerel! Enjoy. Mr. Scruffy: Meow! Meow! Meow! Belkar: So, looks like we're staying here for a few days while we prepare to hit Froggy's. Belkar: Haley and Celia were screaming at each other for hours, but I'll spare you the details. Flashback to Haley and Celia arguing. Haley: You had no right! Celia: I had every right to try to reverse deaths that I accidentally helped cause, through any means at my disposal! Haley: Including using MY money?!? Celia: You mean, money you stole from other people who earned it? Hell, yes! Belkar: Eventually, they stormed off to separate corners. Celia went to talk to that Hank guy... Belkar: While Haley ran out into the rain. Said she had an important errand to take care of in town that was better done sooner rather than later. Flashback to Haley getting her hair cut. Haley: Wow. Barber: I'm sorry, I did the best I could with what's left. Haley: That is short. That is very, very short. Haley: ... Haley: But better, I guess. Belkar: What a day, huh, Mr. Scruffy? This morning, I was a stiff breeze away from the end of the line, and now, we're livin' large in the Guild's crib. Mr. Scruffy: munch! munch! Belkar: And it's all because of you, even if only indirectly. Belkar: I can see now that everything I want out of life is right there, waiting for me. I just need to reach out and grab it. Belkar: Everyone tried so hard to block my path—and in the end, all they really did was force me to learn how to climb mountains. Belkar: All the better from which to pee on them, heh. Belkar: Anyway, it's you and me from now on, pal. Mr. Scruffy: Purrrrrrrrrr. Belkar: We're in this together, to the top of the heap or bust, until the very, very end. Jenny enters, only covering her nudity with some bed linen, "rustle. rustle." Jenny: Belkie...? Jenny: I thought I heard you come back. Did you bring me a sandwich? Mr. Scruffy: munch! munch! Belkar: Well, there are exactly two sandwiches here, aren't there? Belkar: So no, I didn't bring you a sandwich. They're both for me. Jenny turns back towards the bedroom, "rustle."' '' '''Jenny': Well, hurry back to bed, I'm feeling rested for another encounter. Belkar: munch! Belkar: Go ahead and start a solo adventure, I'll be in to join the quest when I'm done eating. Trivia * The title makes a pun of the expression, "Don't hate the player, hate the game." Player Characters (PCs) are characters in a game of D&D played by players, as opposed to all other characters (NPCs) who are controlled by the DM. The origin of the phrase is uncertain, but seems to stem from late 1990's west coast hip-hop sources. Mac Dre released an album with this phrase as the title on January 1st 1998, nearly two years before Ice-T released The Seventh Deadly Sin on September 12th, 1999, which featured a song by the title "Don't Hate the Playa". External Links * 622}} View the comic * 102078}} View the discussion thread Category:Haley Runs Afoul of the Greysky City Thieves Guild